As a former divorce attorney, Jason Levoy has dispensed his fair share of divorce advice.
He’s seen couples fight to the bitter end. He’s seen couples put their differences aside for the sake of the kids.
And his most important advice is to communicate.
The worst divorces are those in which communication breaks down entirely.
If you’re facing divorce, Jason has important advice on how to keep yourself sane, remember the big picture, and get the best possible outcome—even if you don’t have a lot of money for an attorney.
What You’ll Learn
Divorce is … one of the most traumatic times of your life.”
Jason Levoy used to be a divorce attorney.
But he’s not anymore.
“One day,” he says, “I just decided to get up and quit, because I realized I wasn’t helping anybody anymore.”
He noticed a number of people were trying to represent themselves in court, either because they didn’t have the money for an attorney or the money ran out.
He realized that HE could help them.
Not by offering his legal services, but rather by helping them understand the court system.
So he became a divorce coach instead.
What I do is … coach people and instill in them all my experience and knowledge as an attorney … so that they can use it in their divorce.”
He teaches his clients “how to act in court, how to talk to a judge, how to negotiate, what you should even be looking for, and crafting an argument.”
As a result of his years in court, Jason has a unique perspective on what makes marriages break down.
“When I represented people directly in their divorce … I would ask the question, ‘Is it over or should we try counseling first?'”
He adds, “Even though I was a divorce attorney and that was how I made my living, I’d rather see a marriage survive and people reconcile—if it’s possible.”
Ultimately, the couples who couldn’t communicate were the ones with the least chance of reconciliation.
“Everybody is different, but I’ve seen some common themes over the years. With one broad stroke, what I can tell you is it’s really all about communication. The communication just breaks down. Eventually one or both stop communicating with each other entirely, and then that’s usually when the time for divorce arises.”
“If you can still talk to your spouse throughout the divorce—meaning you both agreed that the marriage didn’t work and you’re going to get divorced … but you can still talk to each other like human beings and adults—then those divorces go through the process … smoother, quicker, and cheaper.”
On the other hands, “all you need is one side to want to drag it out and … hurt the other side, and there’s really not much you can do about it. You can’t force somebody to come to an agreement or settle.”
Jason encourages anyone facing a divorce to not go at it alone. Therapy can help enormously. Friends and family are important, but you also “need that objective voice in your ear to keep you level and get you through the process.”
He adds, “It’s so easy to get stuck in the mud of the divorce itself, especially on a daily day-to-day basis, [but] you’ve got to drag yourself out of that mud, and that’s where therapy can help.”
He recommends looking at the big picture. “And what I mean by big picture is: eventually your divorce is going to be over, and you’re going to have your post-divorce life, right? So what is that going to look like? What do you want that to look like? Start putting the [building] blocks in place to create whatever that image is.”
Jason believes the biggest issue in divorce reform is custody. “How do you deal with custody issues when you have two people who don’t agree on how to deal with it?”
To help divorcing couples deal with custody and co-parenting, he’s offering Your Brilliance viewers a free gift: “3 Tips On How To Co-Parent And Protect Yourself Along The Way.”
Jason is also the creator of Divorce U, “the most affordable comprehensive divorce resource that’s available.”
“I created it especially to help people who didn’t have thousands of dollars to retain an attorney—or who had an attorney and the money ran out,” he explains.
“It’s personal divorce coaching provided by me…. I walk you through each step of the divorce process and tell you how to prepare, what you need to do…. Everything that you can think of that you need to do in your divorce is in this course.”
Jump to Topics of Interest
2:33 How Jason became a divorce coach
3:10 What a divorce coach does
4:27 Why do couples get to the point where divorce feels like the only option?
5:27 Could these marriages have been saved?
6:31 What distinguishes long, expensive, drawn-out divorces from relatively smooth and easy ones?
7:49 What happens when one party doesn’t want to cooperate
9:45 Value of therapy
12:26 Keep the big picture in mind
13:51 Biggest challenge for divorce reform: custody
15:51 Jason’s free gift for viewers
About Jason Levoy
Jason is a former attorney turned divorce coach who helps people navigate divorce with confidence and integrity. He is the creator of DivorceU, a comprehensive and affordable program that teaches you through everything you need to know to get the best possible outcome. Find out how you can work with Jason.