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What’s the most awful, horrific thing that’s happened to you in relationships?
For me, it was experiencing the sheer hatred of a man who, once he no longer had me, desired to destroy me.
It’s happened to me more than once over my life. It always catches me off guard. [Read more…] about Let Go of Past Pain
There’s something else Mat Shaffer says in our interview that I think is helpful:
Our relationships are a mirror “for where we are at in our own journey within ourselves.”
If you’re having beautiful, healthy relationships, that’s great news! [Read more…] about Why He Doesn’t Treat You Well
Here’s something I didn’t understand back in my twenties:
You attract who you are.
Not what you WANT, but who you ARE.
That’s a quote from Mat Shaffer’s interview with me, [Read more…] about When You Do Everything Right & Still Can’t Find Good Love
Have you ever lost faith in love?
Have you ever had your heart broken…
Met someone who turned out not to be the man you thought he was…
Looked in the mirror and wondered why he’d ever choose you?
[Read more…] about If You’re Afraid You Won’t Find Love, Listen to Dating Coach Mat Shaffer
In the 20th Century:
If a guy says he’s open to a relationship, he’s open to a relationship.
In the 21st Century:
His behavior will show you if he’s open to a relationship. [Read more…] about Is He a Dater or a Relater?
In the 20th Century:
Be more attractive to men.
In the 21st Century:
Practice the hard skills of loving.
It seemed so obvious at the time: [Read more…] about Don’t Work on Being More Attractive – Do THIS
In the 20th Century:
It’s your responsibility to be attractive.
In the 21st Century:
It’s your “responsibility” to be attractive. (Airquotes intended.) [Read more…] about What’s Wrong With You??
In the 20th Century:
The best way to show him love is to do nice things for him.
In the 21st Century:
The best way to show him love is to understand him. [Read more…] about Be The Woman Who Truly “Gets” Him
In the 20th Century:
He wants a catch.
In the 21st Century:
He wants someone who makes him feel alive.
Yes, you could be slim and gorgeous and accomplished and fascinating… [Read more…] about The Experience He’s Seeking: Is It You?
In the 20th Century:
Interrogate.
In the 21st Century:
Invite.
If you want to get to know someone, what’s the first thing you do? [Read more…] about You Should Ask Him Lots of Questions, Right?
In the 20th Century:
Impress.
In the 21st Century:
Connect.
No wonder we get so nervous about meeting new people. [Read more…] about Don’t Impress Him, PLEASE
In the 20th Century:
Safety means making sure he’s not a serial killer or just wants to get in your pants.
In the 21st Century:
Safety means building trust, communication, boundaries, and accountability into your relationship. [Read more…] about From Serial Killers to Heartbreak: Rethinking Safety in Love
In the 20th Century:
Attractiveness is objective.
In the 21st Century:
Attraction is subjective.
Line up a group of men in a row. [Read more…] about We Are Most Attracted To People Who…
In the 20th Century:
Appearance matters.
In the 21st Century:
Familiarity matters.
I can’t believe the wool has been pulled over our eyes for so long. [Read more…] about Guys Just Care About Looks, Don’t They?
In the 19th Century:
Love comes to you.
In the 21st Century:
You go to love.
Up until about a hundred years ago, young women waited at home for love to come calling – quite literally! [Read more…] about What Flappers Can Teach You About Love
