It shouldn’t take a scientific study to tell us this:
When a woman feels like her partner is a big kid, she loses desire for him.
Losing desire is common in long-term relationships.
But it’s often seen as the woman’s problem.
Something is wrong with HER for not wanting to jump in bed as often.
Is it?
Desire Is Multifaceted
Pharmaceutical companies have invested millions of dollars in trying to invent a “little blue pill” for women. They assume that women would love the idea of popping a pill to get in the mood.
But the world doesn’t need more pharmaceutical shortcuts.
Lack of desire is not a biochemical error. It’s a natural response to desire-dampening conditions.
A woman’s desire cannot be separated from her life, her feelings about her relationship, her body, and the actions of the man she’s with.
If he wants her to be more eager, then it’s up to him to feed her desire through understanding how arousal works for her.
Her Desire Depends on Him
Many women have responsive desire.
This means that their desire awakens in response to their partner’s actions.
A man can awaken his partner’s desire through simple acts like gazing at her appreciatively, touching her arm, making a romantic gesture, or doing the chores.
Yes, I did say doing the chores!
I’m waiting for the day when Cosmo magazine publishes the headline:
“Want More Fun in the Bedroom? Get Him to Do The Dishes”
We know that men who do more housework have more active and fulfilling sex lives.
The question up until now has been why.
Researchers speculated that it was the inherent unfairness. When women feel that their partners aren’t carrying their fair share of the load, they don’t feel as attracted.
But a new study found that wasn’t the case.
The REAL reason that doing more chores results in more fun in the bedroom for men is this:
It shows women they’re living with another adult…
NOT an adult-sized kid!
When women feel like their partner depends on them for nearly everything…
For making meals, doing laundry, organizing doctors’ visits, doing the shopping and the cleaning…
They feel like they’re the only adult in the house.
Not very sexy.
So if you feel like you’re in charge of making your partner’s life run smoothly—because he’s incapable of managing it on his own—ask yourself how it might feel if you stopped taking as much responsibility for him.
How sexy would it be to watch him vacuum, put clothes in the washing machine, and tidy up?
Would it give you space to breathe?
Would you feel more supported?
Would you appreciate him more?
Would those feelings make you more likely to want to receive pleasure from him?
Let us know what you think!