How can you attract a man looking like this?
Just look at your reflection in the mirror. Remember what you looked like back when you weighed hardly anything?
Knowing what you know, would a man look at you and find you attractive?
Your answer is telling.
But not in the way you think.
Your weight doesn’t matter. How you feel about it does.
All the body positive articles in the world can’t make you love what you look like. You have to find the beauty in your own reflection. If you don’t, your love life will suffer.
Glamour magazine famously claimed that:
78% of men would rather date a confident plus-size woman than an insecure supermodel.”
Although their statistics might be suspect, their emphasis on confidence was not.
Confidence trumps waist size every time.
Unfortunately, for many of us, confidence isn’t a separate issue.
The number on the scales affects how we feel about our bodies. We’ve been brainwashed into believing that beauty requires slimness and anything over a size 6 doesn’t make the grade.
It doesn’t help that we know the female body so well. We can see figure flaws even if it takes a telescopic lens. The media brandishes airbrushed images of feminine perfection. We know what we’re supposed to look like. We know where we fall short.
Weirdly enough, men have no clue.
Women are fighting a war over physical perfection, and men are gazing at their navels. They don’t see what we see. They have no flair for art appreciation.
When a man looks at a woman, he isn’t noticing the tailored fit of her dress or the signature red sole of her heels. He doesn’t register the false lashes magnifying her eyes or the careful contouring of her cheekbones. He just sees a nice-looking woman.
That’s it. That is what all her efforts and hours of labor come down to:
“She looks nice.”
A woman looks at another woman and sizes her up in an instant, speed-reading an intimate language of skin condition, hair color and fashion choice.
A man looks at a woman and thinks, “Hot!”
Women constantly compare the shapes of celebrities and models, tracking every ounce of weight loss (“Anorexia fears!”) and weight gain (“Pregnancy rumors!”) through the paparazzi lens.
Men just enjoy seeing pictures of women.
How did we end up on such different planets?
Mike Alvear bemoans the number of women who think men care about weight, writing:
“Women overestimate male preferences for slenderness. Constantly. Consistently. In nearly every study.” 
Science has proven it. What women think men want is not what men want. Our miscalculation is so bad that researchers study us in dismay.
Women think men want slim women. Men aren’t so bothered. They want confident women who love their bodies.
Which explains the phenomenon of absolutely ordinary women who attract men without having any visible advantage.
Women who love their bodies and take a great deal of pleasure in having a body exude the kind of physical confidence that’s irresistible to men.
These women know that men would have to be stupid not to be attracted to them. They smile like the cat who’s got the cream.
And men pick up on it. They can read those signals.
If a woman holds herself like a particularly naughty prize all wrapped up in a bow, she’ll pique a man’s curiosity.
It’s not her body shape. It’s her knowledge of what’s underneath.
Wwaring gorgeous lingerie might just do more for your love life than losing 10 pounds.
Looking at your reflection in the mirror and blowing kisses to each neglected inch of your body might just attract the man of your dreams faster than Spanx.
So is it really your weight that’s the problem?
Of course not.
It’s how you feel about that weight. It’s whether you’re able to love this body of yours. It’s your suspicion that only slim women get the love they deserve.
Love is too important to wait until you’re slimmer.
Find your beauty in the mirror. Let that be your diet plan.