Can I ask you a question?
Can I ask you why you want to be more feminine?
Is it to be more attractive to guys?
If you’re nodding your head, then I’ve got some research that might just blow your mind.
But first let me give you what you asked for….
The simplest way to get a femininity boost is to soften.
Take in a deep breath and let it out slowly. Soften those insides…
Then shake out that tension. Soften those tight muscles…
Finally, relax that racing mind. Soften your voice.”
Softening helps you calm down, relax, and open up to a wonderful experience. It reminds you that you don’t need your sword and shield. There’s no one to impress, no one to fight, no one who’s going to hurt you.
Now, that’s the end of my advice on how to become more feminine. If you want to click away, go ahead!
Because what’s coming up next is so challenging that you might need to sit down for it.
The Truth about Femininity
I’ve been in the dating and relationship advice world for about 15 years. In that time, I’ve heard very few people dare to tell the plain truth about femininity.
Ready for it? Here it is:
You’re not the only one who needs feminine energy. He does, too.
Feminine energy is important for BOTH men and women.
A man who’s got a healthy balance of feminine energy is responsive, empathetic, emotionally intelligent, and a great listener. He doesn’t have to be in charge all the time. He loves it when you take charge, because he gets to sit back and admire your awesomeness.
Both men and women need masculine energy, too.
Your masculine energy enables you to get things done, go after what you want, and reach for the stars. It makes you a kick-ass superwoman, the kind guys salivate over. NO guy wants to get stuck with a passive woman-child who leaves all the decisions to him … not in the 21st century!
Time to Kick This Myth to the Curb
Perhaps THE biggest myth in dating is that men should be masculine and women should be feminine.
It’s the kind of myth that’s custom-made to make you feel bad about yourself. No man can ever be masculine enough, and no woman can ever be feminine enough.
So you end up chasing an unreachable goal, all the while missing out on healthy relationships.
Researchers have known for decades that the best relationships are between what’s known as psychologically androgynous people.
These are people who have a healthy balance of masculine and feminine. They don’t rely on the man to be “the man” or the woman to be “the woman.” They swap roles. They’re flexible. And their reward is higher marital satisfaction and better sex.
But dating advice has glorified the union of the masculine man and the feminine woman. This pair is not known for having a great marriage or even a great sex life, despite what you’ve been told. Why?
Well, a masculine man is only half a man. He’s not psychologically whole. He needs a woman to project his unconscious feminine onto. He can’t feel like a man if he admits that part of him is nurturing, sensitive, and emotional, so he dumps all that onto his wife or girlfriend. She’s the nurturing one. She’s the sensitive one. She’s the one who gets emotional.
That’s a lot of weight for a woman to bear.
When masculinity goes over the top, marriages break down. It’s not fun to be with a man who thinks women should be feminine at all times and it’s not his job to do “woman stuff.”
New #CoupleGoal: Wholeness
Relationships succeed when BOTH of you have a strong feminine side to complement your masculine side.
The Pew Research Center found that the most important trait men and women want in a partner—yes, it’s the same for both—is care and compassion.
And the two most effective ways a man can win a woman over, according to evolutionary psychologist David Buss, are:
- Being helpful when she really needs it, and
- Going out of his way to be kind, nice and caring.
So go ahead. Be more feminine. Just expect the same of him, too!