What’s Wrong With You??

In the 20th Century:
It’s your responsibility to be attractive.

In the 21st Century:
It’s your “responsibility” to be attractive. (Airquotes intended.)

“How do you expect to attract a man like that?”

Ever heard someone say that?

(Ever said it to yourself?)

It used to be, it was a woman’s fault if she wasn’t happily married.

All she had to do was look after herself, put a little bit of lipstick on, and TRY.

But if she wasn’t going to try…

If she had the audacity to think she could do her own thing and a man would just fall into her lap…

Then she deserved to grow old in a small apartment with a dozen cats.

Sadly, things haven’t changed much as they should.

As much as I love me some #couplegoals, love has become just another arena where we feel inadequate.

“I’m divorced—is there something wrong with me?”
“I haven’t had a relationship in 10 years—is there something wrong with me?”
“The romance has faded in my marriage—is there something wrong with me?”

There are lots and lots of “experts” who will tell you, “YES! There’s something wrong with you! And I can fix it!”

That should be reassuring?

“Tell me what’s wrong with me so I can fix it” only SOUNDS empowering.

It’s not.

Not everything is your fault.

Love isn’t just for perfect people.

Fixing yourself is a project that will never end.

What deserves your time and energy…

Focusing on yourself and everything that’s wrong with you?

Or focusing on what you want and exploring different ways to get it?

You can have the love life you want from exactly where you are.

Start by spending more time doing what lights you up.

P.S. This is at the heart of the Pleasure Principle. If you haven’t gone through your 4-week pleasure program yet, start here.