Find Out Who You Really Are (When You’re Not Pleasing Other People)

Women wear a lot of masks.

There is the mask of perfection…
The mask of “I have it all together…”
The mask of being a “good mom…”
The mask of being thin when your body is really meant for curves… 

Pleasing other people to fit in and feel accepted takes a lot of work and energy. Especially when you have to repress, hide, and mask your authentic self.

Over time, you can end up exhausted, depressed, even physically ill.

Sometimes, we must wear masks to blend into various situations and maintain a certain rapport with people we encounter in our everyday life.

But when those personas accumulate, they hide who we really are, what we believe, and what we desire. We can end up feeling like an impostor in our own lives.

How have you used masks in your life?

Maybe you’re wearing a mask for a job you don’t like, or for a group you’ve had to join, or to be around family members who don’t share your beliefs and values.

Do those personas require you to be agreeable—with a sort of smile-and-nod behavior—in order to fit in?

If so, over time, you may feel dulled by the rote of daily living.

Who Are You, Really?

Wildness is the antidote, inherent in your authentic self.

But revealing authenticity is scary, because it requires vulnerability.

You may wonder, “What will people think?” or “What if nobody likes the real me?”

But the truth is that your genuine personality is the best version of you, because it will allow you to bring forth far more gifts than a false persona ever could.

And you’ll find that people who resonate with you will be attracted to those parts of yourself you’ve kept hidden.

Best of all, you will feel enlivened and liberated.

Reclaiming lost parts of yourself and returning to authenticity is a transformative process.

Be gentle and courageous as you begin to explore your own nature, personality, beliefs, emotions, needs and desires that have been buried underneath the facades of social and cultural conditioning.

3 Steps to Finding Yourself

Here are a few simple ways to get you started on your journey of reconnecting with your authentically wild self.

1. Keep a Journal

Journaling in a private notebook is a great way to know your true self better. It’s helpful to free-write daily streams of consciousness to feel and know what comes through. Don’t judge your words or writing style. Let your feelings and observations flow freely to release what you’ve bottled up.

2. Dance

Physical movement can help you to connect with and release the emotions that are likely to arise as you shed layers of these alternate personas. Free-form dancing and other somatic movement therapies are wonderful healing modalities to try.

3. Get Out in Nature

Make a habit of spending time in nature with all of your senses open—sight, sound, touch, smell, taste and intuition. As you receive through your sensory conduits, you will attune to the rhythms of nature and coax out your inner wildness.

Creating personas to fit in or hide how you’re feeling is depleting. It takes a toll on your physical, emotional and spiritual well-being.

While life does require us to wear masks at times, underneath them is a tamed soul that wants to be spontaneous, child-like and free.

Your authenticity carries unique gifts that are meant to be shared with the world. Take the risk to be honest with yourself about your original nature.

By fully embracing and expressing your authentic wildness, you will feel healthier, happier, and more at peace.

When this happens you will learn to become your own authority—self defined from the inside out—living an authentic life, fulfilled with higher purpose and deeper meaning.