Mostly A’s: Emotionally Safe Relationship
Your relationship seems grounded in mutual respect. You can express yourself without fear. Keep nurturing that trust, and keep an eye on any subtle shifts over time. Even good relationships need maintenance.
Mostly B’s: Normal Relationship Challenges
You’re likely in a mostly healthy relationship that still has room to grow. Occasional defensiveness, conflict, or withdrawal can be normal—but only if both partners remain open, respectful, and willing to work through it together.
📘 Want tools to keep it healthy? The Relationship Rewrite Method can help.
Mostly C’s: Relationship Imbalance
If you feel punished for expressing needs, boundaries, or feelings, that’s not healthy. It’s a sign the relationship could be leaning toward control rather than care.
📘 Learn how to spot “Girlfriend Training” and push back safely inside Why Is He Mean to Me?
⚠️ Important: Controlling behavior tends to escalate. Seeing the signs early gives you options.
Mostly D’s: You’ve Got Trouble…
This is more than conflict. It’s a pattern where anger, blame, or coldness show up whenever you aren’t acting the way he wants.
You may be experiencing what I call “The Mean Switch,” a painful shift from connection to control that leaves you feeling like everything you do is wrong.
You may care about him a lot, but if this keeps happening, it’s not going to get better on its own. It may already be costing you more than you realize.
📘 Please read Why Is He Mean to Me? for clarity, compassion, and a plan.
🧰 Start with the Triage Toolkit in the book. It will give you small, immediate ways to protect your heart.
💬 And if you need someone to talk to, reach out. You don’t have to figure this out alone.